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Use Your Negotiation Skills To Help Manage Tough Conversations

The most significant thing we learn from effective negotiations skills training is the significance to establish a specific frame for a conversation, otherwise we are starting our discussions within the default frame of the other party. The following is a couple of points to consider as you get ready for a tough discussion.

1. Remember that you are dealing with someone who has dreams, hopes and goals similar to all of us.

When you have to deliver terrible news, make sure that you frame it sensitively. It is necessary for people to maintain their self-worth and there is no reason to build resentment & resistance within your counterparts.

For instance, let's say you have had a poor performing staff member who you have decided to let go.

One way of delivering the message could be:

Jack, after carefully considering your track record and considering our previous meetings about your poor overall performance, I have reached a decision to discontinue your services. Unfortunately my assessment is final and I would like you to give in any outstanding items and depart with immediate effect.

Another way of delivering the information could be:

Jack, it saddens me to inform you that I have made a decision to cancel your services. I reached this resolution because it is important that we have a 100% fit between our requirements and your ability to deliver and I feel strongly that your expertise will be more sought after in a different kind of role instead of this one.

If you feel that you really wanted to continue in this kind of role then I would really like to recommend that you pay attention to the following, and perhaps commit to further development in this regard. Thank you for having made the effort to meet our standards and good luck with your future initiatives.

In the second example you are at least recognising the belief that an effort was made on the part of the employee and that you are willing to help them improve their approach to enable them to be more effective in future.

2. Effective negotiation training confirms that we must declare our weaknesses.

If you have done something for which you need to apologise, do not shift the blame, but take complete responsibility. We have a lot more respect for those who admit their mistakes than those who dodge responsibility. Follow up your admission of guilt by asking the question how you can remedy the problem. Very few individuals have the expectation that everything needs to be perfect at all times. After all, we are all human and it is inevitable that you or anyone else for that matter are going to be making mistakes from time to time.

If you ask whatever it is that you can do to remedy the situation you will be amazed to learn that in most cases people will be more than happy with the fact that you apologised and will not demand anything additional apart from an assurance that the error will not be repeated.

Remember to treat individuals with dignity and compassion. Even those folks who appear to be hard as nails often act this way as a defence against getting hurt.

It is certainly not always easy to treat other people with respect and dignity but it is certainly a target worth pursuing, but use this advice and add to your sales training objectives, the results will speak for itself.

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